Pulp Wrestling: Peanuts
Posted by Jules McPherson on 10/22/2006 
Not everyone can be a winner. Quite frankly, that statement pretty much surmises my entire life outside of a few fleeting achievements on the oh so grand stage of Internet Wrestling Columnist award competitions. Not that I would classify myself as a complete loser, (although I’m sure there are others who could probably make a convincing argument to the contrary..) but in the grand scheme of life in comparison to the fake world of pro-wrestling I am definitely what most people would consider a jobber. My real life job is that of a garbage man, one of the lowliest professions on Earth. I pick through the leavings of other men in order to ensure the cleanliness of my community. In fact, jobber is probably overshooting my importance by a wide margin, I’m probably far below that level, somewhere in between the guy who mops the sweat and other bodily fluids off the ring mat and the guy who does the Big Show’s laundry.
In an ideal world everyone would be seen as equal, and worthy of love regardless of their position in the overall scheme of things. For if it is true that all men are created equal then you would think that would make us not so different from snowflakes in the aftermath of a freshly fallen flurry. Each one is distinguishable, yet also indistinguishable yet no one flake holds any real significance over the others. But despite what well intending elementary school teachers may tell you otherwise, we are not in fact, snowflakes. We are humans.
Human beings like snowflakes are vastly different, yet in all of us there are exhibited many similar traits, thoughts, hopes, dreams, desires, morals,and ideals. Regardless of religion or even where you rank socially, somewhere, there is something that links us all together. Yet unlike the snowflakes which pack together to create a beautiful canvas we often find ourselves clashing together to create a different but equally interesting overall portrait. Human beings are endlessly vying for position with one another and are ever obsessed with how they measure up in comparison to their fellow brothers or sisters. We strive to be smarter, stronger, richer or in some way more well off than the next guy.
Often times we can convince others that we are in fact at a higher level than them, and thus is created the syndrome of vicarious fulfillment or hero worship. Not that I’m condemning the practice, since in many ways it’s what keeps the wrestling industry, and also pretty much every other entertainment or sports industry in business.
For myself personally though, I’ve always valued mentors and teachers more than heroes.
Mentors and teachers.
Right there is something that is desperately lacking in the wrestling business as well as life in general. We have plenty of heroes, anti-heroes, and downright villains, but on the other hand the number of people who pursue this field as a career whom I would consider worthy of being thought of as real honest to goodness mentors and/or role models are few and far between indeed.
Of course, I’m speaking in an area that is very subjective as my values are ultimately dissimilar from yours and others, and thus our role models and inspirations are bound to be as different as the sky is long.
Getting back to my lowly lot in life for a second though, I classified myself as a jobber earlier. So if I’m cursed to being this world’s version of enhancement talent, then who makes up the rest of the card? Who are the mid-carders, the main eventers, the promoters, and even, the referees and announcers?
Let’s begin with the obvious. Promoters would be akin to politicians, record executives, GM’s and people who have achieved various levels of authority and prominence in their respective fields.
The main eventers would undoubtedly be divided up by the minority of our world’s populas that are filthy stinkin’ rich celebrities. Through whatever means they have managed to climb the ladder of success and notoriety and wind up at the top, with many throngs of fans who worship them as if they were God’s of their own private heavens. They are the movie stars, the rock stars, and known sports athletes, the people whose poster you have plastered on your wall. They are known worldwide for their talents and ability and as said, are given godlike status because of said gifts.
The next step down would be your under card guys. Your B and C level celebrities, character actors, journeymen athletes, some of them are appreciated devoutly by their own loyal sect of fans but the fact that their names don’t generate as much mainstream buzz as the mega-stars pushes them down to the rung they are at.
Then we have the announcers. These are the men who provide play by play and keep us up to date on how the match or card is going. Their equivalent would be reporters and news anchormen. These are the men who are relegated to report the news, but are helpless to influence or create it.
After this you have your referees. They are supposed to enforce the rules but are endlessly overrun by the wrestlers who overpower and outsmart them many times over. Does your local police force come to mind? These men and women are expected to protect and serve yet often are under-equipped and outgunned by the ever growing criminal element.
Before we get too far along, let us not forget the lowly and crafty managers, ever deceitful and always looking for a way to advance their goals by working through the loopholes of the system and sometimes even out and out misrepresenting and abusing it. Lawyers anyone?
Last on the list, are the jobbers. Your typical everyday working man, who has no fame to speak of and doesn’t have a throng of people to enhance his ego at any given moment. In our society we are made to feel well below those who have acquired such fame as those listed above. In fact, if we are ever even permitted into the overall story of life in the first place it will only be as an extra or brief liner note, or as a replacement right fielder.
Anyone who follows baseball knows that right field is the most dreaded of all little league positions. It is the position given to the fat kid, the lanky kid, the clumsy kid, or the stupid kid. Right-field is the proverbial ‘Sunday Night Heat’ of baseball. I know this because I was a right-fielder my entire little league career.
In all of these various fields there are numerous awards and titles to be held, and levels of glory to be had. It’s part of humanity’s ever confounding need to have everything and everyone assigned it’s own particular level of worth instead of just appreciating what everyone brings to the table through their own uniqueness equally.
And where in all of this, are the role models you ask? In hiding. Can you blame them? Look at how we’ve treated those who’ve tried to help us advance beyond our own prejudices, or misconceptions in the past. Jesus? Crucified. Abraham Lincoln? Shot in the head while watching a play. Martin Luther King? Also murdered. Ghandi? Ditto. I could go on listing prominent teachers for the next ten years, the fact is, whenever someone pushes us to move beyond our comfort zones in this world and gains any level of success, their expected lifespan is extremely shortened almost instantaneously.
In the end we are left with smaller figures who serve as mentors and role models in our personal lives. Fathers, mothers and friends of assorted degrees. These people may not have religions established in their name, or cultural movements started in their legacy, but their impact is still as vital and important as any role model on the worldwide scale. For your sports representation they would be your coaches. They don’t get nearly the recognition the athletes do, but their presence is absolutely necessary nonetheless.
So right now I guess you’re wondering, what in the name of Stacy Kiebler are you talking about Jules? My message for this column is a simple one. It was inspired by the recent passing of longtime WCW jobber Joey Maggs.
When I heard of his passing, it got me to thinking about all the people in both life and wrestling who play lesser roles in the movie but are just as needed in the end as any well known figure. Think now about all the little people in your life who have played a part in shaping the person you are today. I’ll bet most of them are not millionaires. Just like every wrestler cannot attain the same level of success as a Stone Cold, or Hulk Hogan, the level that those men sit on would not be posibble without the diligence and work put in by those who perform thanklessly on the undercard of life. It’s all sort of like one giant game of Jenga you see. Take out one too many pieces, even if they aren’t the obvious ones and the whole shebang comes crashing down.
We jobbers are the foundation of this world. We keep the wheels greased and keep things moving forward in general. It’s the same in anything, the ones who are seen as the most important are normally the least important, and the ones who are perceived as the least important are normally the most important. Take us wrestling fans for instance. It is our viewership and obsession that keeps this whole little world spinning. Without us, it would all go away. In comparison, when you look at the most well known figures in this or any industry you find they are largely interchangeable, determined on what
our current interests are. We may be unimportant to most, but we make up the fundamental support and glue of the entire universe. Sure we get kicked around alot, but we can take it.
Jobbers may not be the most well paid, or well respected of all wrestlers, but they are nevertheless needed, just as much as any big name star. Without them a piece of the puzzle is missing and is therefore incomplete. In the end, it all boils down to one thing. It’s not money, or any other useless accomplishment that men seek after, but pure and simple passion/devotion/love. No matter where you rank at in the grand scheme of things, whether you're at the top or the bottom, if you’re not passionate about what you do, it shows.
Therefore if you take a look at the most widely admired figures in any field, you will normally find very driven people who have a love and respect for what they do. Likewise, if you look at the most vilified men in history, you will find men who valued only themselves, instead of what their assignment was. How ironic, don’t you think? The men who aspire to promote themselves above us end up being the least loved, and the ones who simply work hard, and stay persistent regardless of what others around them think, end up being the most widely admired.
To end this rant, I leave you now with the following little survey created by the man who wrote the Peanuts comic strip. I think it sums up my message better than any of my ranting incoherent words ever could. You don’t have to answer it personally, just read along and I think you’ll find the overall message.
1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America crown.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.
5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.
How did you do?
The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners. Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:
1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.
Easier?
The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones that care. Thank you for reading.
Send all feedback to: pulp_wrestling@yahoo.com
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