Hey, guys! I can't believe people are still reading this column. Heck, I'm surprised people don't just hit the back button when they found out they are at my column and not Linda Robin's or Mike Steele's. Anyway, let's move on. I got a lot of new stuff to do today, and for starters, a new installment of Nonsense Thoughts.
First, I regret to inform you that I have yet again switched to a new e-mail address. It is dougienunny@thewrestlingvoice.com. Please send all your mail there from now on. Don't worry though, my AIM screen name is still Dougie Nunny, so just IM or e-mail me when you want to say something or complain or whatever it is you want to do.
The second thing I would like to talk about is one of the worst subjects in the world..me! Nah, I'm just playing. Anyway, I'd like to talk about the feedback I get and what not. The feedback you guys send me is just somewhat incredible. I mean, an hour after I post, I get at least 25 instant messages and about 10 or so e-mails; it's just amazing. I tell you, I never thought in a thousand years I would forget to check my mail, and then check it the next day and have about a hundred e-mails about my column, it's amazing! Also, right now I'd like to address some questions people have posed for me, and as well as give a little homage to a certain fan out there.
The first question I normally receive is "How old are you?" Well, I am 17 years old, almost 18. The second question I receive is "Who made your signature for you?" My girlfriend, Laura, actually made it for me as a good favor, and I think she did one hell of a job. And the last most common answer I get is "How many sites do I write for?" Well, at the writing of this column the list is this:
TheWrestlingVoice.com
WrestlingInvasion.com
WrestlingExposed.com
4W-Wrestling.com
24Wrestling.com
JarosWrestling.com
ProWrestlingLife.com
ProWrestlingNews.com
RingSideInformer.com
WWFSmackdownZone.com
HeadlineWrestling.com
World-Wrestling.net
WrestleMayhem.vze.com
Wrestling-Edge.com
WrestlingNewsWorld.com
WrestleStop.com
WrestlingAttitude.com
WrestlingExposed.com
Wrestling-Limit.vze.com
TheWrestlingOutlaws.com
WrestleCHAOS.co.uk
So that makes the final count...21! And if you would like me to write for your site or any site you know, simply e-mail me and tell me.
Oh yeah, I also wanted to share with you guys something interesting that happened to me. Some people notified me that some sites were posting my column and renaming it theirs and what not, so I went to google.com and typed in my column name to see if anything would come up. It didn't, so then I decided to put my name up, cause let's face it, you're not going to find the phrase "Dougie Nunny" on many sites. Well the bad news is I did not find any sites that were doing this. The good news, however, is that I found a wrestling blog. I was kind of confused as to why my name was there, however, so I read a little down and then I found out why. The writer of this blog is an avid Hurricane fan, and he quoted my "Cruiserweight Main Eventer" column and talked about how it was true and he liked it. Now, it's one thing to send me an e-mail or an IM, but to dedicate an entire blog entry to me and my column? That gave me a new feeling of pride I have yet to feel. So, because of this, I would like to say thanks to Ron who wrote the blog and I'd also like to plug his blog: http://blogofthehurricane.blogspot.com/. Anyway, moving on...
Well, it looks like Sean O'Haire is gone. Does anyone remember that column I wrote a while back called "Smackdown's Shaft and Superiority?" Well it seems that now more than ever they are getting the shaft. When they had the staff cuts, they cut Ernest Miller, Zach Gowen, and Chris Kanyon. Hmmm...what show did they belong to? Smackdown! Oh yea, Brian Kendrick and Brock Lesnar left WWE. Gee, I wonder...what show were they on? Smackdown! Kurt Angle and Big Show can still wrestle, but they have to take it easy. Which show again? Smackdown! At Wrestlemania, we had 3 inter-promotional matches, who lost twice? Smackdown! You see where I'm going with this folks? Honestly, people wonder why they hate Smackdown; well it is because of WWE!!!!!
So I'm sick right now, and like any other wrestling geek, what do you think I'm doing? That's right; watching wrestling! Yesterday I watched the Ultimate X2 match from TNA featuring Low Ki, Chris Daniels, Chris Sabin, and Michael Shane. If you haven't seen it, I am sorry. It was literally one of the best matches I have seen in a long time, and I just loved how the match came out from stuff like the B.M.E. or the sick ladder hits. I was really happy to see Sabin win it, but to be honest, I wish Shane would have won it. If you don't know, he won the first one, and to be honest, I think he should have won this one so that it could be deemed "his type" of match. If you don't understand what I'm talking about, think about Edge & Christian in TLCs and Undertaker in HIAC. Well, Undertaker is a bad example since he lost a couple...but oh well!
So what about WWE? Shelton Benjamin over The Game? Excuse me before I get overly excited. Doesn't anyone remember a strapping young wrestler going over one of the best of all time last year only to return back to "jobber/Heat" status? That's right; I'm talking about The Hurricane. He beat Rock about the same time last year and then went toe to toe with Flair, Jericho, and Triple H, but after that, did his push continue? Hell no! He moved right back to his jobber status. So excuse me if I don't get excited about one of the best wrestlers beating The Game, because I think the same will happen. Now I'd like to add something else. I wrote the above statement before Raw on April 6, 2004, and Shelton Benjamin won again‼.but did he really win? Is a count out a big win for someone? Does it put you over? No, it doesn't. It simply means that you were able to hop in a ring before 10, and Triple H couldn't. So does this disprove anything I just said? No. Shelton Benjamin...enjoy Heat.
Anyway, that seems about it for today. I wanted to say a lot more, but I know I lose a lot of you if my random thoughts exceed 2 pages. So let's move on to the main point, shall we?
Well, as you can tell by the title today, we are going to talk about the "ingredient" of a wrestler. But not just any ol' wrestler, no, we are going to get the ingredients of the best! So let's see...to be the best...what do you need? Wedding Ring with inscription from Stephanie McMahon? No! Gigantic body? No! Intelligence? Well‼it's preferred, but no. So what do they need? Why don't we find out below, shall we?
In-Ring Talent
This is the first ingredient and probably one of the most important. Though it is one of the most important ones, however, people often say that someone who is good in the ring will be a perfect wrestler. Well, we know that's not true. Lance Storm may be one of the most gifted wrestlers today, but I'm sorry, he bores the crap out of me with his tone, and he is really predictable no matter what. But anyway, in-ring talent is a MUST to be a great wrestler. Though we have had wrestlers such as Sid Vicious and Hulk Hogan whose work is mediocre at best, we still keep this credo. People like Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero come to mind when we think of this. They do everything in that ring. Diving off the top rope, submission moves, suplexes, etc., and they do it all perfectly. Hell, half of the time, you can't even see the Crippler Crossface or the Triple Suplex coming, and they still manage to pull them off and to perform them with such skill that the crowd is on the edge of their seats with their mouths more open than the last time we saw A-Train get a push. But like I said above, this talent some people have isn't it for what makes a great wrestler, so what else is there?
Vocational Skills
I always, always, ALWAYS put this one second, because in my mind, it is very important. Imagine this. Which would you rather have...someone who can really get under your skin and back up what he says in the ring or someone who just comes out and wrestles? If you said number two, you must be smoking some RVD-brand drugs. Look at this for instance? A lot of criticism Goldberg got as Champion was his inability to cut a decent promo. Let's face it guys, the guy could barely speak two words without grunting or looking like he needs a dictionary, and did this fly well with the fans? Hell no! Attendance flaked off when he was in the spotlight, and no one could have given a rat's cute booty if he was there or not. But then we get someone like Eddie Guerrero! Man, can he cut a promo and either get the fans behind him or get under their skin, and of course, ticket sales went through the roof when he became champ. Do you see just how integral the vocational skills a wrestler has can be? Look at Booker T Vs. Triple H at Wrestlemania XIX. The major themes of that match were indeed racism whether or not Booker T was in the same "league" as Triple H, and with that said, everyone went into the match thinking about those things. But would we have had that thought if it wasn't for Triple H's remarkable promos before WM XIX? Would we have had such a crowd enthralled? Would they have been on the edge of the seats more if there wasn't such a promo? Ok, see now you put the letters "N" and "O" together, and we get our answer! That wasn't so hard, was it? Moving on‼.
Gimmick
Let's face it guys, these things most people shrug aside as trivial can be an integral part in a wrestler's greatness. Look at this fine example. In OVW, Rico was one of the most gifted wrestlers there. He had a natural skill that no one could match, and it seemed that my jaw along with everyone else's dropped whenever he performed his "Sudden Impact." What happens though when he is called up to WWE? He is given an "ambiguously gay" gimmick that obligates him to portray that gimmick, like any smart wrestler, in the ring. However, when he portrays that gimmick in the ring, what is the outcome? The mask of a shoddy wrestler, that's what. Every time I think he's going to resort to his old self of great technical wrestling, I get him rubbing his body up against Maven. You can't blame him really; it's just his gimmick. If he didn't portray his gimmick, we would all be complaining as well. But this is just one of those examples of how a gimmick can hinder you. How can it excel you? Well let's look at perhaps one of the greatest gimmicks of all time...The Undertaker. Never before was someone like him seen, and it allowed him to portray a larger than life character in promos and in the ring by suddenly sitting up after a massive blow or by talking in a voice that made some shake in their loosely tied boots. This gimmick made Undertaker and is one of the reasons he enjoyed much of his success. The gimmick was just so original and improved all of his other "ingredients," rather than hinder them like Rico. So there, gimmicks are important. What's next?
Charisma
Ok, this one is a duh, people. Let's see...who do we want? Someone who will run down the ring dancing to the music (or if you prefer, someone strutting to the ring telling the fans off) or someone who just simply moves like a robot named Batista...I mean...no I'll stay with Batista...and shows no expression or feelings? Do we want someone who will emit a level of intensity in the ring or someone who looks like they are constantly befuddled by their next move? This one is a no-brainer guys, and if you are still sitting there pondering the answer, you need to just close your Internet Explorer and go somewhere else.
Look
This kind of goes with the gimmick part, but I feel that it involves a closer look. When you see someone like Shawn Michaels strut to the ring before his match, your mouth just drops. He always has that kind of outfit that makes people gape in awe and marvel at. Yet then you get someone like A-Train who wears shorts......as well as Rock, Triple H, Randy Orton, Batista, etc. They all wear the same thing, so when someone differs from that, it really makes you stand out. Hurricane's getup always catches an eye and hopefully keeps it throughout the match so people can marvel at his other ingredients. Most people take for granted some things about a person's look, but I guarantee you that if you had a dark match with a regular guy in some black trunks going up against some guy in some full body outfit, you'll remember the guy in the full body outfit. Are we done yet? NO!
Finishing Move
Yea, you may think I'm running thin on ideas, but please hear me out before you pass judgment. Now this could have fallen under the in-ring talent, but come on guys, your finishing move is one of the best things a wrestler can have going for them. Ok, I can give you some good examples. Can anyone tell me Rob Conway's finishing move? I think about 2 readers out there know what it is, but the rest of you are scratching your head worse than the time Triple H won at Armageddon. But when I ask you what Brock Lesnar's was, everyone screams at the top of their lungs "F-5!" The cooler the move, the more devastating, the more used, the better named, etc. a move is, the greater you are. I have a perfect example. Batista may not exactly be great, but as soon as he added and started using the Demon Bomb a lot more, people began to take notice. Same with Randy Orton and the RKO and Hurricane with the Shining Wizard. Though it might be small, this is something you can't ignore. You forget, moves like the Stone Cold Stunner and the Ankle Lock are moves that you can make a match out of, so of course they have to play an integral part in a wrestler's mold. Ok, one more people, I promise.
Popularity
This is a must. You can not be a great wrestler without it. I am not talking about people who are always cheered no matter what, but people who are recognized and respected. People who move merchandise, as opposed to people whose merchandise collects dust worse than Triple H's treadmill, are the popular ones. People who come out to any kind of pop, negative or positive, for it shows recognition. People who can do anything and get a reaction are the popular ones. Heck, when Stasiak had his crap "Planet Stasiak" gimmick, people still cheered when he did that trademark look, and that shows at least some popularity. Without this, where are you going to go in the wrestling business? To Heat or Velocity or NWA-TNA, that's where. Think about it. It will make sense after a while, I promise, and if it doesn't, the column title does say Nonsense, so you can't blame me.
Well, if we were to put all that into a pot and bake it for thirty minutes at three hundred degrees Fahrenheit, we would have ourselves the perfect wrestler. Well, that just leaves the burning question each of you has inside‼..who has all these qualities? Well...you'll just have to tune in next time for that answer!
Anyway, that's about it for now, so let's go ahead and get the QOTC, MOTC, Cheap Plug, and of course, my famous, or rather infamous, IQ stinger.
For this week's quote, I decided to go back in the day of the classic Jericho-Stephanie promos where Jericho ripped on Steph much like he does to Trish now. So what did I pick from this gambut of quotes? Well, why don't you just read and see:
"Well Stephanie, I'd like to thank you for giving me such a kind Christmas gift, but unfortunately I didn't get you any gifts. But then again, what can you get for the girl who's had everyone." - Chris Jericho to Stephanie McMahon, December 2000
And what do I have in store for you for the MOTC? Well, while I was sick, as you read above or at least I hope you read above, I watched the Ultimate X2 match. Well, I kind of went on a TNA splurge while I was sick so for this column, I thought I'd reflect on that and give you a very good match to watch. It's got everything and just shows you how even the World Title can affect everyone. Trust me, it's worth a look. Here it is:
Jeff Jarrett Vs. AJ Styles, December 3, 2003
Well now it's time for the cheap plug, but instead of WI, I have a new site to plug. Fellow columnist Mike Steele and I have started our own site. It is called The Wrestling Voice, and it is the first of its kind. It is a strictly, and I do mean strictly, columns site. There are no news, no interviews, no reports, JUST COLUMNS. We are slated to open on Easter, and when we open, the internet world will never be the same. At TWV, you will find the debut of such columnists as John Garvin and Miky Morrison, as well as find some seasoned veterans as Linda Robin and Dean Saliba. Of course, you will also be able to find Mike Steele's column as well as mine here, but you probably already figured that one, huh? If you are interested in writing for us, please e-mail jobs@thewrestlingvoice.com. We are accepting applications from everyone, even from people with no experience, so get to writing people, because we need a sample with every application! To sum it up, The Wrestling Voice opens on Easter; it will be the best site, so go visit.
TheWrestlingVoice.com - The premier site for wrestling columns!
Well, it's that time, gang. Join me next time as I delve into the short list of wrestlers with the "Total Package" as I call it. This is Dougie Nunny signing off from "Column O' Nonsense," and I hope I dropped your IQ lower than the amount of time it takes Shelton Benjamin to jump back to jobber status.
AIM - Dougie Nunny
E-mail - dougienunny@thewrestlingvoice.com
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